Can I even begin to describe how happy I am that this colder weather has seemed to arrive earlier than expected? Summer appears to have ended suddenly, and without notice. (I never check the weather forecast unless I know I’m going to be out in it. That was always Joe’s job.) Spending our winters in Florida was never on my…
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“People that commit suicide don’t wanna die, they just want the pain to stop.” -Joe Beckley That’s what Joe told me two weeks before taking his own life. After he walked into the house and handed me his gun. “I took it to the shop, I put it in my mouth, and held it against my head. I am so…
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Three months today, 13 weeks yesterday. Time does NOT standstill. Not even for a second. But I am making progress. I’ve been dreaming and believing in a new way; I’m excited about some things. I’m making plans. I’m moving forward. I just got to spend two weeks with Travis and Amanda out west. It was good for my soul, and…
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How I have loved stepping back in time. Discovering the music I had forgotten about for so long. For YEARS. Music has sustained me through this time. It has brought up so much: memories, tears, laughter- all of it. Dancing. Singing. I’m glad that I live in the country and can play my music as loud as I want too…
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Right after Joe died I began looking through pictures and videos. Some I had not seen since I first captured them. This was one of them. I remember making the video but I had not watched it since that night- not that I could remember. It was all new to me. I cannot tell you how amazed I was when…
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